Size isn’t everything, as long as you have goats

I am fascinated by this cultural obsession with tiny houses. It seems like everyone is talking about some tiny house they saw on tv that had a built-in sauna and BDSM chamber. Tiny houses pop up in my Facebook feed daily. Hell, I even think if I become a famous screenwriter/humorist/standup comedian/trophy wife I will …

Don’t call me a cougar!

I don’t like being called a cougar. I don’t know when it became such a dirty word. In recent years, I was even guilty of judging cougars myself, vehemently correcting people that I was a puma (ergo, under 40). I wasn’t fond of being a puma either, because pumas are just lesser cougars and my …

Please don’t feed the sharks

One of the first clues that a relationship may not be particularly healthy is when your friends nickname him “Psycho.” We nicknamed everyone….Turtle, Manwhore, Polish Pete, Tony Robbins, Wonderschlong, etc. Psycho J was a former military guy, so he gave new meaning to obsessive-compulsive disorder. He was a total clean freak, and only wore white …

My date with a Greek god

I met Todd online during my OKCupid phase. I should have followed my instincts when his profile talked about enjoying swinging an axe to chop wood. It’s a slippery slope from chopping wood to being fed into a woodchipper. (I grew up in Connecticut, and this really happened to a woman here. That shit sticks …