Starting over…again

There are some things one can only achieve by a deliberate leap in the opposite direction.” — Franz Kafka. I suppose it's not a good sign for a blog that strives to be funny that I am quoting Kafka. I promise I won't get all weird and talk about bugs. But hey, I'm back, bitches! …

The “Get off my lawn!” debate

Welcome back to night 2 of the Democratic beauty pageant to elect Joe Biden. I have to admit night one was rather amusing. Well at least the memes were this morning. I don't have high expectations for tonight given the contenders, but I've covered myself in Ben-Gay, strapped on my bunion corrector, and now I'm …

Let’s get it on….(liveblogging debate #1)

Back by popular demand of three of my loyal followers. In the words of Marvin Gaye....let's get it on. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if Cory Booker unbuttoned his shirt and started singing that. He needs some media attention. So, who's up first? I can't even keep track of them all and I've been …

Daddy don’t forget

I took the dog for a walk this morning and had a thought—what if this is all I’m meant to have in this life?  I mean, there’s got to be a reason why nothing ever works out for me.  There’s a reason why I’ve been single for ten years.  There’s a reason why I have …

I may be haunted…

When I decided to go to Edinburgh, I knew there was a lot of history there, but I completely underestimated what a creepy city it is.  Yes, everyone knows Jekyll and Hyde was written there (based on the true story of Burke and Hare).  So was Harry Potter, so you’d figure there was a penchant …

Want to see my hairy coo?

Considering all my travels in recent years, you would think I would have better luck on tours.  For the most part I plan my own intense itinerary, but sometimes it is just easier and cheaper to pile into a minivan and not have to worry about driving.  But for some reason I often end up …

Where have you gone, Dylan McKay?

I haven’t watched Beverly Hills, 90210 in twenty-odd years, and yet I’m feeling a profound loss today.  And I’m not the only one.  Every woman within a 10 year range of me is expressing shock and sadness over the death of Luke Perry. There have been so many YouTube clips shared, even of his death …

Why I don’t have kids. Choose one.

I don’t understand what it is about babies that makes people lose their freaking sense of boundaries.  American society is so politically correct now you can’t tell a decent joke without people getting offended.  That’s how you end up with Amy Schumer in movies. Americans don’t want to talk about sex in open society, but …

Dear 2019: Please Don’t Suck

Happy 2019 to all my loyal readers! I must apologize for my absence in 2018, but from the latest Gallup poll, I'm sure your year sucked as much as mine. I was also quite absorbed in the machinations of the Mueller investigation because I love a good story of espionage and treason. It dates back …

45….When the fuck did that happen?

I sat down tonight to write my annual birthday post. In preparation I decided to go back and read my previous ones, and realized I didn't even do one last year. So maybe it isn't even some ritual I am compelled to do after all? However, given my lack of inspiration to write consistently over …